Today’s outfit idea is to attempt to look young(er).
Hehe…
Off-shoulder blouse and denim skirt.
The trendy coordinates younger teenage girls would wear.
I pair it with the Rosaria Riggens bucket bag from Mizzue in brandy wine colour and a pair of white sneakers just like those Korean street fashion shoes.
I did not style my hair at all, I just simply tie a knot and put on some really light makeup.
This, is how I imagine a younger version of me would look like.
When I was younger, say in my 20s, my dream is to be a freelance writer, travelling the globe with my guitar and my jobless and artistically talented boyfriend. We will sail the seas and live a nomadic life together. We would write songs and stargazing at some distant lighthouse in Pladda, a small remote island off the west coast of Scotland…
That were the dreams that I had those days.
As I grow older and become a mother, there are more and more “restrictions” or so-called social stereotype. There comes the “age-appropriate” attire, makeup, hairstyle, lifestyle etc… I have to put family and my kids first, then myself as last in the priority list. I become more self-conscious. I started to “confine” myself to wear more decent clothing, learn how to cook “proper” meal, feed my children first, travel less and try to “achieve” those things that are expected of a woman in her 30s, such as having an investment property and a good career…
Sometime in the sleepless nights, I would still think of those distant dreams I once had.
And most of the time, I felt like I have expired.
My dreams have expired.
Somehow, I do feel a bit uncomfortable to accept the fact that I am getting older.
I keep telling myself, “Those days are over.”
Life circumstances have changed and shaped me so much. I felt a mixture of feeling, upset because of losing youth but feeling blessed at the same time because of the happiness marriage and children have brought me.
I shared my thought with a friend, and she sent me a message like this:
There are different beauties at different stages of a woman’s life. You mellow like the red wine or tea rich in taste and emit a fragrance of maturity, wisdom, depth, and confidence. Over time and experience, you find your own identity and position, develop your character and personality. With your hard work and learning, you are reaping a good harvest of what you sow in all areas of your life. Like a diamond being grinded in all angles, you shine with different radiance with time.
I feel so deeply empowered.
God makes all things beautiful in His time.
I should not feel constrained or less desired, I should not think that my dreams have expired.
Because I am still passionate about life, about pursuing goals and believe in dreams.
In my heart, I am still that girl who wants to dive in the Caribbean Sea, join a beauty pageant contest, backpack to Greece and have a date with Kelvin at Harajuku, dressing up like a Lolita *LOL*
I seldom put on casual looks, but this outfits coordinates has made Kelvin very impressed.
This bag from Mizzue is very comfortable to wear and matches the casual outfit very well. 
It also has a small pouch inside to keep cards, coins or keys.
The off-shoulder blouse in white goes well with the light denim skirt.
I sort of feel young and free again.
(Sorry to spam you with so many pictures of myself. We were having beautiful sunset and breezes from the Johor straits. It was all wonderful and we couldn’t help but took more pictures.)
Perhaps.
Age is just a number.
Do you feel the same too?
Share with me.
XOXO Eryn
